The James Watt Breakfast Blog

Take your trousers off to be amazed

14th May 2012

My theory that anything you buy for less than one pound isn’t needed got a lot of reaction. Think about it - nothing in this world that you spend less than one pound on is vital to our life! Food isn’t allowed in this theory, but no item of such low price is really worth owning. This is a real fact! Could we live without pound shops?  No problem. Life may be less exciting without the chance to own a squashy toy in the shape of Simon Cowell, or a pencil sharpener made to look like a golf ball, but life wouldn’t stop. Let me know what you think on this - you know I write the truth.

An amazing fact came my way which will make you want to take your trousers off this week. You can tell if a pair of trousers will fit you if you hold them round your neck.

This is what you do

1: Take your trousers off, do the button up,

2: Hold them like a cape

3: Hold the waistband round your neck

4: If it is snug round your neck, they will be a perfect fit

This is great for parties, and also if you go in to one of those cheap shops without changing rooms, or they are too busy, try the trick in store. It will save loads of time

Thanks to Una and Rochelle from The Saturdays for coming on the show. All great fun, really great to get a couple of popstars on that were great at having a laugh, and had plenty to say. If you missed it I will stick it on my podcast on Friday.  Denise Welsh and Bradley Johnson from Xfactor are on the current one. Denise talks about eating men!  Are celebs getting nicer in real life – these 4 were great!

Video of the week is from Tom who has split from his girlfriend and wants to give a holiday away - its fun, I think the chances of you getting the holiday are slim!

Catch you in the morning on The James Watt Breakfast Show 6-10am

Posted by James Watt at 11:15am

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Katie Price has ceased to exsist and a pole dancer comes to cheer us up

2nd May 2012

Pole dancing on the radio that’s what you need at breakfast , so that’s what you got! To celebrate Mayday and UK pole dancing day Nanette came in to give us a demo. Nanette arrived with Pole and podium it was erected in the car park.  The way to be a great pole dancer is to be a bit naked. I found out it’s all about the skin and the pole touching. As we broadcast live Nanette whipped off her clothes and started to perform under my direction. The plank,  the totem pole thing,  and the upside down shimmy and slide.  Some of the best pole dancers are men apparently, so after a quick lesson I impressed the assembled crowd with my gyrating and swinging.  Check out the photos and videos here.

Katie Price – I am fed up with her so an offer has been made. I will not mention her name on air this year. If I say her name Katie Price, or Jordan on Minster FM , I will give the first person that calls up £100 – The other people on the station can mention her if they must , but I will not say it! Someone trickily had the name Katie Price on the Birthday Call earlier today, but I didn’t crack!

Here is a great website to check out how popular your name is , someone with too much time on their hands has worked out how many specific names  were named in the UK each year, No one called Les in the past 16 years, Doris and Engelbert  is pretty rare too!  Cut and paste this

 http://names.darkgreener.com/

Stand by for my new hit record Where's Me Queen  Where's her throne  coming soon! Catch you in the morning.

http://audioboo.fm/boos/765458-a-song-for-the-queen

Posted by James Watt at 12:49pm

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Chocolate, girls, and bananas

26th April 2012

I am now an official chocolatier! I was invited to Nestle to make Kitkats. They make one billion a year in York for the UK market - that’s a lot of fingers.  Tracy from News and me got through security, signed the health and safety form that insisted we would not walk and use our mobile phone at the same time! We met Vicki in the product development department, where they invent new chocs, where the magic is made. All very secretive in fact things were shifted and hidden from view, just in case we saw a new top secret brand! A team is here in York to make the next big thing. We had a go at making kitkats. The secret chocolate recipe is only know by a few people – we were doing this by hand, so first tempered the Chocolate poured it in the special moulds and added the wafers, all very gooey and great fun. They turned out really well, so I can now add chocolate maker to my CV!   You know when you buy a bar of Chocolate abroad you always think it tastes a bit different, it probably does , Kitkat is made in each country specifically designed for the taste of that nation. So a Japanese kitkat will taste different to ours. We got a taste of some Japanese ones. A Wasabi flavour,  a Chilli version, even Pumpkin. Kitkats over there are often given as gifts, we saw about 20 different flavours.  The other bonus you get to wear a pink hat!

 And if you want to find out more you can hear more of me chatting to Vicki about how to make Kitkats right here! 

My favourite survey of the week is that only 1 in 8 women think they are attractive. I bet the ones that think they are, are not the pretty ones. It’s a dilemma if you think you are attractive it makes you less attractive! Holly Willoughby came top of the best looking women, being loved made women feel attractive and paying a woman a compliment makes her happy. So try this one of ‘you don’t sweat much for a fat girl’ and see how you get on!

Website of the week is www.fiverr.com you can offer anything for $5, its a crazy site , If you want someone to sing Happy Birthday whilst dressed as a banana , get someone to shout your name whilst counting money, or record an inspirational message for you its all there. I haven’t worked out what to do , but for $5 I might play a song on my trumpet for you

If you haven’t heard my Queen and Throne song yet the link is here. Not sure if I should write the second half of the song or throw it straight in the bin. Let me know.

Catch you every morning 6-10am!

Posted by James Watt at 1:11pm

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My what big feet you have

17th April 2012

A great survey I did earlier revealed the truth – what every woman wanted to know. a guy’s name reveals the size of his let’s say feet! 

Just in case you are unable check out his feet before you get too involved this handy survey will mean you don’t get any nasty surprises.  So here is the list of which names have big ‘feet’ and which are little dinky ones

The top 10 big are these 

1. Dave
2. Paul
3. Steve
4. James
5. Mark
6. Robert
7. Chris
8. Andy
9. Richard or Dick
10. Dan

The small guys are

1. Ray
2. Brian
3. Nigel
4. Frank
5. Keith
6. Jeremy
7. Josh
8. Barry
9. Dennis
10. Nick

Have a look round the office and check out the survey!

How do you fancy being a Variety Artist? Well here is a quick guide to what sort of act would be best for you depending on your personality. Would you make a great Drag queen, Burlesque Dancer or Contortionist?   

Oh and thanks for One Direction for coming on the show. Hear it on the podcast it might be the little known American One Direction, but I won’t tell if you don’t. I spoke to Sean O’Leary lead singer with the American One Direction, who are claiming £600,000 from Simon Cowell and co, as they claim they used the name first!

Sean said  ‘I first thought  of the name as a kid  when talking to his dad about when things are tough, the only way to go is in one direction and that represents the band in every single way’. They have been around since late 2009 way before the UK version were invented. Sean added ‘We have all put our hearts and soul in to this band and we are not going to let them push us around’.   

The five member American One direction have a similar look to the UK group, but play their own instruments.  They have a couple of Albums to their name. And would love to come to the UK to meet their new fans.

Catch you in the morning at 6am  

Posted by James Watt at 12:37pm

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Marry One Direction, meet The Queen, and Elephants in space

12th April 2012

Your chance of marrying a member of One Direction is 0.0000019% that is assuming 256 million eligible women who are available! After the revelation of Harry’s third nipple girls are going mad for them. Beatles mania or nipple mania all over again!, But all is not happy One Direction the American group of the same name want £600,000 from Simon Cowell and co for the name, as they claim they were around first. We have found their website and they look like One Direction and sound pretty similar too! Check them out here.  You can go to one of their gigs for free if you are in California. I am thinking of setting up the UK fan site!

The queen has a bigger pull than One Direction I reckon , When she came to York the other day so did the world. The sun shone it was really great. I was a little concerned only royal nutters would show up. Let’s face it some royal followers are a bit weird. But in York I didn’t find any. I was reporting for Minster FM from the crowds, we had the idea of me strolling around the crowds saying hello, catching the excitement. But it was a bit like being kettled in a riot, once you were in position no moving was possible, I had a very near miss with union flag!  All great fun. So hello to all the people who I had a squash and squeeze with on the day.

Celebrity endorsement is what it is all about apparently, so we now have official connections on the show with James Dean, Gregory Peck, Paul McCartney, Will Smith, Michael Jackson, Dick Turpin, and Donald Duck , plus loads more . None of the above are the famous ones, but listeners or friends with the same names.  So if you want Harry Potter or Elizabeth Windsor to open your garden fete we can probably track them down!

Don’t forget an elephant has been spotted on Mars this week – it’s true. It has a remarkable likeness to Lulu the one that pooped on Blue Peter many years ago!  Its little gems like that that could make your morning complete every morning!  Catch you in the morning 6-10am Monday to Friday.

Posted by James Watt at 11:29am

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